trying to find the balance between growing up and staying young. trying to understand womanhood but my roots are so deeply planted in childhood. i find emotion everywhere, and i get so attached to the stories i create. to me it doesn’t matter if they aren’t real because they’re real in my head. it’s so hard to describe this to people, so hard to make others understand because i don’t even understand myself. i fabricate everything because that’s how the story is told in my head. i dream in fiction but it so often clashes with the real world. how can someone like me who loves the inside of her head so much find the balance? is it okay that i always want to be inside my head? is it okay that i am always somewhere else? is it okay that i always want to be this way? how can i grow up without growing up? how can i feel safe about this process?