to the girl who i saw in the bathroom, and the second i lay eyes on her
i knew something had gone terribly wrong, and i could not
go back to the dance floor, to the girl who was molested by the
security guard, i told you to gently place your palms against mine,
and you can give me all your pain, i’ll feed you back happiness,
it’s okay, don’t you worry, i can handle your pain, i hear your screams,
to the girl who was crouched in the corner of the bathroom stall,
melting into the walls, because her boyfriend didn’t
understand what she was going through, and i told him
to stop talking, so that i could tell you to remember the magical land
from when you were five, where grass waves hello and birds sing
you to sleep, and he had the nerve to tell me that i should have
seen you two years ago, he says you’re much better,
now, and i told him she’s already perfect, don’t you fucking
dare say shit like that connoting that she needs you, that
she is only the person who she is because of what you’ve
done, because i know that’s exactly what you meant, she is
beautiful with, or without you, but then i was smoking a cigarette
in the bathroom stall, and the security guard found us,
and i ran to the dance floor to hide, i thought i’d never
see you again, i didn’t know if you had begun to
ease the pain, to the girl who i spontaneously
ran into at the dance floor, you smiled and hugged me and gave
me a necklace that you wear to every event, and i told you
i couldn’t accept it, you told me i had healed you within
minutes, that that is more than anyone could do
in a lifetime. i almost cried, but darling, i want you to remember
that the process of trusting me, was actually the process
of trusting you, that my palms touching yours were
actually your own hands, craving to be healed, the bond
you created with me was actually a recreation of
the connection you lost from yourself, i am merely
a mirror, a representation of you. to the girl who believes
she is in love, i hope one day you
break up with your shitty boyfriend, i don’t say
this often, if at all, but you
deserve better, he created a world where you need him,
he told you to remember that one time you two
went to big sur together, i told him to shut up, i told you
to remember the five year old that picked flowers
and strung it into a headpiece.
don’t fall for the lie he has created for you,
he’s manipulated you into a world where
you are nothing without him. he said he could
help you, if only you would
listen to him, bullshit. i never once saw a relief
in your eyes when he was talking to you.

you are everything without him.

to the girl whose name i never learned,
to the girl who has dancing eyes, who relishes in
tropical colors and sunny meadows,
run free.

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1 comment
  1. this is powerful. It’s amazing how brief encounters can often mean so much.

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